A Place to Write

Aspen is getting more and more personality each day. Her excitement is really starting to show in her legs. I remember the same thing happening with Eisley. The more excited she got, the fast her chunky little legs would move. Now Aspen does the same. Last night we went for a walk/bike ride. The girls rode bikes (Kaybree with no training wheels and Eisley still with training wheels) and I pushed Aspen in her stroller. At one point the girls got too far ahead of me so I started jogging with the stroller and feeling the wind in her face, Aspen's legs started swinging happily. It was fun! Aspen is another mama's girl but not too strong yet. Maybe Brendon can still change her mind! she loves Grandma Vance and she laughs the loudest for Eisley. All Eisley has to do is run toward her and Aspen lets out a shriek and a deep belly laugh. Aspen does not enjoy being held by Eisley but I think those two are going to be good friends. Both of those younger girls will always depend on Kay...

Someone on Facebook said they are finishing up their training and they are concerned because the training keeps talking about the worst case scenarios. They just wanted to hear some good experiences. I got on a soap box a little bit. Here is what I wrote: Whenever I think about our foster care journey I don't have a lot to brag about. We've had a teen for 2.5 years and in that time we've been woken up by the police, we've found countless vape pods and cigarettes in his bedroom, we've watched him fail classes and have to change schools over and over again. He has had more jobs than I've had my entire life because he has trouble keeping them. He's attracted friends that are having unsafe sex, getting drunk, overdosing and breaking laws. When I'm being realistic I think he'll end up homeless or in jail when he leaves us. And yet--it's really not the worst thing ever. I'd do it all over again. I know his past is hard and his future is uncertain...

This week's Come Follow Me lesson was about listening to parents. Brendon showed a video of a little girl who wouldn't stay buckled into her carseat--until her grandma explained why it was important to stay seated. To stay safe because I love you. We asked the girls why it's important to listen to parents. They got stuck on safety for a while but then we mentioned cleaning. I told them we ask them to clean so they can learn now how to keep their house clean. Kaybree: Yeah cause if you become a grown up and never learn how to clean it would be a disaster! Eisley: Does _____ not know how to clean? I know I shouldn't judge others but I died laughing at that. I hope she doesn't go ask that person directly. I explained most adults know how but sometimes struggle to find the time to clean so that's another skill we have to work on while young--finding time to clean. Both girls bore their testimonies on Sunday. Kaybree wrote her testimony down on a piece of pa...

I love to travel. I love experiencing new things, seeing new things and stepping outside of my every day. To me it's a slight adrenaline rush. You never know what could happen but I feel confident following the example of people who have gone before me. If a place is generally safe for most people, I feel comfortable going there and I enjoy every second of it. It's not the same for J. You'd think a child who has lived with more families than he can count would have no problem adjusting to new cultures or people--yet he hates travelling out of state. Street smarts don't transfer, he explained. That only leaves him one card to play--physical strength--if he gets into any trouble. He's assessing his risks in a very different way than me. His survival instincts tell him to stay in his safe zone. Stay where he knows the laws, the culture and the general rules. Stay put. He told me last night his life has gotten a little boring and he's not sure how he feels a...

I have to teach a lesson to all the young women on Wednesday about modesty. I’ve already written about why that’s a tough topic for me. I don’t want anyone to be ashamed of what they are wearing or judge anyone for wearing something else. Brendon and I had a long conversation about how to teach this concept and the possible pitfalls. Modesty really should have nothing to do with men. The actual definition of modesty is decency. It’s a church cultural thing that ties it so closely to the way we dress. But being modest really means being a decent human being and our clothing should reflect that. We should wear clothes that make us and those around us comfortable. As I fretted over how to teach this we sat down for lunch and asked Kaybree what she had learned at church today. She said she learned her body is a temple. When we asked what that means at first she said to avoid drugs and things that would cause harm to our bodies. I asked “what about what we put on the outside of our bodi...

Kaybree came to me at 12:42 a.m. to let me know she was going to heat up the heating pad for an aching foot and that she had not fallen asleep yet. I had been asleep for hours and the house had been silent. I know she was trying to sleep. I slipped out of bed and snuggled up next to her, hoping the comfort of having me nearby would be enough to lull her to sleep. I stayed there for almost an hour, tickled her back, and snuggled up close. Still she was awake and frustrated and worried that she would be exhausted for school the next day. I gave her melatonin and let her come into bed with me. Still, she couldn't fall asleep. Her head started hurting. I gave her ibuprofen. Another hour passed. She started to cry because of the pain in her head. Finally, like a breath of fresh air, Brendon rolled over and said "What's wrong, sweetheart?" He took that precious baby girl in his arms and gave her a very short and simple priesthood blessing that her head would feel bett...

"But what if I don't make any friends?!" you shouted suddenly as angry tears reached your eyes. Going to school is not what you wanted to talk about during Family Home Evening, my sweet Eisley girl, but it had to be done. I told a story about a girl who was brand new to school and when she got there on the first day she realized everyone else was brand new too and they were all scared too. So she talked to someone and she made a friend and she found out everyone else was scared about making friends too. On Monday you girls start school. Kaybree will be in second grade. Eisley will be in kindergarten. J will be a senior. (Senior, part 1 of 2...) J is resigned. He knows he has to go back to school and he's not excited about it but he has accepted it is necessary. Kaybree is excited to see friends again every day. Eisley is terrified. Eisley is not a shy girl. She speaks up when she needs to and she can jump right into crazy when it presents itself. But she has had...