A Place to Write

Eisley got baptized yesterday.  She asked Brittany and David to give the talks because she loves them the most. Both did an excellent job and bawled through it. David did mention during his talk he would NOT have given a talk if it had been anyone else asking him. When it was time to go into the water Eisley froze at the top of the stairs and cried, saying she did not want to do it. Eventually she got brave and walked into the water. The heater was broken so the water was cold but she made it through! Later she said she was scared because she didn’t want to have everyone watching her. A part of me wonders if she was afraid of the commitment.  Everyone treats baptism as a big deal. Like it means you can never make a mistake again or you’ll be doomed. That’s a lot of pressure. I want my kids to know it’s the opposite. Baptism is a reminder that we all make mistakes. That’s why Heavenly Father provided a way to remind us to be better next time. To change our hearts and our minds.  Baptism

  I took this photo mid-sword fight tonight. *No one was hit by the broom. J text me this morning and asked if we had dinner plans. I invited him over and he quickly accepted. He has a new job and has lost some weight. It’s been a while since we caught up. When we were first gettin licensed Kaybree was 5 and Eisley was 3. We knew we wanted a teenage boy. It seemed like nearly everyone asked us if that was wise. I’ve often reflected on that.  Yes, teenage boys have hormones. They can be rough and smelly and use bad language. They can also be so fun. Kaybree and Eisley and even Aspen all look forward to visits from J. Seeing them talk and laugh during dinner tonight made my heart swell. Sometimes when I talk about our foster experience I feel like I need to add a caveat. Yes—we enjoyed it and we love J BUT we did not save him. He did not graduate high school. He did not choose to live with us until age 21. I am not the only woman he calls “Mom” (although I may be the only “mother”). But