Skip to main content

I'm here

By

It's after 11 and I'm sitting in the dark, listening for the sounds of skateboard wheels on the road outside. I was asleep. I'm very tired. But here I am.

I'm not sure why I'm sitting here. I had a fine day and no trouble falling asleep when my head hit the pillow at 10. But I know it's been a rough day for you. You lost some friends and accidentally took it out on others. You don't know who among your circle to trust right now.

It has nothing to do with me. You didn't even sound upset when I spoke to you on the phone. But I worry. So here I am.

You told me you're spending the night with a friend. This is a usual occurrence and I have no problem with it. I'm not sitting here because I think you're lying or in any danger.

I'm sitting here just in case you stop by and feel the need to unload your thoughts. I'm sitting here so I can remind you that your feelings are legitimate and ok. I'm sitting here just in case you want to talk. It's all I can really offer you most of the time so it's a job I take seriously. I should be sleeping. But I'm here.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Work stuff

By
 My job is difficult to describe to people outside of non-profits so I usually don't. I say I'm a Grant Writer--because I am, but to some people that means a lot and to others it means nothing. I don't get too many people who are interested. To be truthful, I do think grant writing is a spectacular professional that takes a lot of skill. Not only do you have to be an excellent writer, able to tell the stories of the organization in a way that is interesting and inspiring, but you also have to be savvy enough to find your way around hundreds of different online portals (none of which are user friendly) and be diligent enough to meet strict deadlines and compile loads and loads of paperwork. At my organization we submit about 15-30 applications every month and every single application has different requirements and expectations in order to receive funding. The work doesn't stop when an application is turned in. Once we get that funding it adds another to-do to our list, m...
Post a Comment
Read more

I did it!

By
Today, I achieved a great professional achievement. I got my CFRE. It’s a big deal.  Brendon is out of town so I took the girls to get sushi to celebrate. This was our conversation on the way home.  *Passed by a Husband and Wife Law Team billboard Eisley: That dude wears suspenders. I would not call them first. I would call Jonathan first.  Me: I would call Brother Briggs first because he’s a criminal defense lawyer. Jon does HOA law which would not be very useful. Eisley: Ooo yeah. I feel like I’m going to be that kid some day. I’d call Brittany because she has experience, then Bro Briggs.  Me: You’re going to be the one to call to hide a body?  Eisley: Yeah. I’ll probably already be hiding one. I feel like I’m the Brittany, Aspen is Brodie, Kaybree is Dad.  Kaybree: Hmmm, I’m not sure. Aspen—do you like girls? Aspen: What? Kaybree: Just, would you like to marry a girl one day? Aspen: No.  Eisley: If you did, we would love her.  And then we all l...
Post a Comment
Read more

Tearful moments

By
In January I cried through my appointments with my oncology doctor and surgeons. The whole idea of having a preventative mastectomy was overwhelming.  I made my peace with it. I made a plan for myself. Work slows down near the end of the year and we get all sorts of holidays so I thought if I could take my time off then, I would be fine. I made it through two whole doctor's appointments with no tears and no fear, because I had a plan, and then today that was messed up. My doctor told me reconstruction could take up to three months--which means I can't do the surgery when I originally planned if I want to get it all done in one calendar year (for insurance purposes). She suggested moving it up to August. That is next month. And if we do the surgery in August that means our family trip we have planned for October--it's a no. Camping trip I planned for September? Probably not. And honestly that all makes me more upset than anything. And suddenly I'm crying again.  I want t...
Post a Comment
Read more