Would you do it?
"My teenage son’s friend asked to live with us. He’s 18 but decided to stay in foster care to finish high school. I know he has a failed adoption in his past. We have 3 young kids. Would you say yes?"
I’ve been asked by a few people if I knew now what I knew then, would I have fostered? At times my answer hasn’t been clear but today I got that clarity. I read that message posted in a Facebook group and I realized the poster was talking about J. He approached another family about moving in with them. And I told her I would say yes.
Isn’t that weird? I told another person to say yes to going through what I’ve gone through. I told her he won’t stick around. He’s not good in school. He deliberately broke my heart. But he’s a good kid.
I think J senses a change in me. I just don’t know how to move forward in this moment. I don’t want to stop him from moving on but all my human instincts are to be offended. How dare he leave us and find a new family? How dare he tell me he wants to stay in my life while he replaces my role. How does one cope with that?
I don’t want him to feel bad. Even if he changed his mind I won’t let him stay. I don’t want him to. I can’t let him break my heart any more. I have to move forward. How does one explain that? How does one do that?
"My teenage son’s friend asked to live with us. He’s 18 but decided to stay in foster care to finish high school. I know he has a failed adoption in his past. We have 3 young kids. Would you say yes?"
I’ve been asked by a few people if I knew now what I knew then, would I have fostered? At times my answer hasn’t been clear but today I got that clarity. I read that message posted in a Facebook group and I realized the poster was talking about J. He approached another family about moving in with them. And I told her I would say yes.
Isn’t that weird? I told another person to say yes to going through what I’ve gone through. I told her he won’t stick around. He’s not good in school. He deliberately broke my heart. But he’s a good kid.
I think J senses a change in me. I just don’t know how to move forward in this moment. I don’t want to stop him from moving on but all my human instincts are to be offended. How dare he leave us and find a new family? How dare he tell me he wants to stay in my life while he replaces my role. How does one cope with that?
I don’t want him to feel bad. Even if he changed his mind I won’t let him stay. I don’t want him to. I can’t let him break my heart any more. I have to move forward. How does one explain that? How does one do that?
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