A Place to Write

In season 9, episode 21 of The Office Andy decides he needs to move on from Dunder Mifflin but then reality sets in and he realizes what a huge mistake it is and he goes back--and then he remembers his dream and decides the only way he can move forward is if there is no option to move backwards. He spends the rest of the day making everyone mad and being a terrible employee to ensure he can never go back to being an employee there. That's kinda what J did this week. He left on Wednesday for no real reason. Someone made him mad online and he decided to try to confront that person in person, even though he knew he should be staying home (and the smart thing would have been to just turn off your phone). Once he was out he decided to stay out. He wanted to test it out. Went for a walk. Met up with some friends. Smoked a cigarette or two. Decided not to go home. When he came home last night he told us he had no excuse. He had no reason. He just wanted to do it. It was impulsive. It ...

J didn't come home last night. I don't have any idea what is bothering him. We've had no disagreements or fights in the last few days but--he's gone. Here's a little timeline: - J texts me in the morning to say he doesn't feel well. I stayed home sick the day before so I tell him to take a sick day and sleep it off. No big deal. - J texts me around 11 and says he's not being lazy today, he did do some schoolwork and he's going to clean a few things. I tell him not to worry about any of that, get some rest. There is homemade chicken noodle soup in the fridge if he wants some and theraflu in the cabinet. His responses seem in a good mood. - 1:30ish I can see J on camera being goofy, singing loudly and doing a bunch of nothing. That's fine. - 3 J texts me says he's a little pissed and is going out. Will be home before 7. I respond that I need more info than that. After a half hour I add that now I'm a little pissed. The rule is if you sta...

There are times when the girls say something with so much attitude and it hits me--they got that from J. I think when we were originally getting licensed to foster that was a concern. How will this child we bring into our home effect our children? It's why I wanted to foster an older child. I didn't want my kids to feel like they have to compete and honestly I didn't want them hanging out so often that my child's innocence was colored. I think J has been very respectful of our childrens' innocence and he does his best to keep swear words and things like that out of our home but he's still had an impact on our family. Mostly it's positive. I believe my girls notice people's differences but don't instantly judge a person because of their differences. I like seeing that process. They are more aware of good and bad but also aware of the grey in between and how someone's bad choices don't define them. I feel like I do the same. But we also h...