A Place to Write

Ten years ago I got a call from Amy. She told me we were needed at the hospital. Michelle had been there for a few days. She'd been there on and off for weeks. She would be sent home, then fall and need to go back. It was terrible every time. This time when I got there Mom, Dad and Aunt Karen were all in a conference room and they told us the doctors were out of options. They could try a potential surgery but it probably wouldn't work and it would be painful. She was in a coma with a machine helping her breath and they had decided to make her comfortable and let her go. We sat by her bed all day. We cried and laughed and remembered. And just like Michelle, she waited until we had mostly left to finally pass away. Today Katie wants to release balloons. I told Jose he can come or not. He chose not because he didn't know her. I think he would have liked her. She didn't try too hard to be nice. She wasn't particularly outgoing but if she didn't have anything to ...

In a few weeks we fly to Utah for new seminary teacher orientation because my sexy husband just got hired! I could not be more proud of this boy. Ten years ago when we met this was his dream career and I was so excited to support that. He's put it off long enough but the past few months he has been his happiest self and today it all came together. I rushed home from work at noon to be here when the email came and I got to read over his shoulder as he was offered a position. We won't find out where for a few more days but we are thrilled. I had the thought tonight that this is it. Brendon finally has his career. And I have mine. And this is our life. And it is amazing.

This week we'll finally find out if Brendon will be hired to be a seminary teacher. It's been an interesting process. Each month the spouses are invited to attend a special training and each month the message is about finding joy in the journey and trusting the Lord. It has been explained to us over and over that if you are not hired all full time it not about your worthiness or your effort. It's really just that the Lord is not calling you to do this work at this time. When we were discussing whether or not we would fast this month for this issue Brendon said it feels like fasting to become Bishop. If the Lord wants you to be a bishop, you will be. You don't need to fast for it. I of course feel nervous about this. We have no back up plan. We have found nothing that brings Brendon as much joy as this does. I can't imagine his reaction if the answer is no. But Brendon said he feels peace. The youth theme this year is D&C 19:23. Learn of me, listen to my word...