Girls, I'm scared for you.
It's getting harder and harder to spot girls who value modesty.
At Sunsplash you stand out if you're wearing a one-piece swim suit. At the mall the summer selection is tank top after tank top, all low cut and sleeveless.
Your dad and I went to the mall last night. He always has a need for more Nike shirts from JC Penneys. Now their selection is geared more toward back to school shopping so the clothes have sleeves but we went to another store, Aeropostale to get some jeans for me and couldn't find any. All they have is jeggings. (I got some. They're cute.) All the tops were cut short to show off some stomach or were sheer so they'd need an under shirt. All the shorts were way too short for me to be comfortable with and the ads in the store--well it was a 40% off sale and the marketing people decided it would be fun to have their models 40% clothed. Your dad was shocked.
I hope as we raise you, you find value in dressing modestly. Not for anyone else but just because you feel better when you dress modestly. I know I do.
There are a lot of blog posts going around right now about modesty so let me address it a little:
Some women are bashing the saying that "modest is hottest" because they want their daughters to feel beautiful--not hot. I think it's ok to feel hot. To feel sexy. It's ok to be sexy! I just want you to know that the sexiest thing about a woman is her confidence and when you're dressing in something classy and modest--you ooze confidence. That's beautiful. And hot. And that's good.
Some women are saying you don't need to dress modestly to benefit the boys--boys should be taught to respect women all the time. They should. Boys should be raised to view women as women and not as their bodies alone. They should be raised to control themselves at all times. That should be expected. But still--boys and wired to be attracted to girls. That's how it is. Girls in skimpy clothes are distracting and not in a good way. When you dress modestly you make it easier for boys to be around you and focus on you as a person.
I don't know how we'll teach you girls about modesty. I guess by example is the best way. It's difficult when even family members buy you sleeveless outfits (you're babies so it's ok, right?). Some day we'll have to crack down. We'll have to talk with you seriously about where the line is when it comes to clothes. I know your dad will be more strict than me. That's his job. But I hope he doesn't have to be. I hope you feel confident enough that you just gravitate to the clothes that speak to your inner beauty. I hope you find joy in long skirts that swish like a bell and tops that you can move around in easily without worrying about a slip up. I hope you find what's comfortable--versus what's popular. I hope you're active and adventurous enough that a bikini just won't work for you anyways.
You are beautiful girls. I know I'm biased when I say that but you are. So I'm pretty sure you'll be attractive to guys no matter what you wear. It's ok to dress up and wear clothes that fit and to feel sexy but just remember it's your smile guys will be attracted to first!
It's getting harder and harder to spot girls who value modesty.
At Sunsplash you stand out if you're wearing a one-piece swim suit. At the mall the summer selection is tank top after tank top, all low cut and sleeveless.
Your dad and I went to the mall last night. He always has a need for more Nike shirts from JC Penneys. Now their selection is geared more toward back to school shopping so the clothes have sleeves but we went to another store, Aeropostale to get some jeans for me and couldn't find any. All they have is jeggings. (I got some. They're cute.) All the tops were cut short to show off some stomach or were sheer so they'd need an under shirt. All the shorts were way too short for me to be comfortable with and the ads in the store--well it was a 40% off sale and the marketing people decided it would be fun to have their models 40% clothed. Your dad was shocked.
I hope as we raise you, you find value in dressing modestly. Not for anyone else but just because you feel better when you dress modestly. I know I do.
There are a lot of blog posts going around right now about modesty so let me address it a little:
Some women are bashing the saying that "modest is hottest" because they want their daughters to feel beautiful--not hot. I think it's ok to feel hot. To feel sexy. It's ok to be sexy! I just want you to know that the sexiest thing about a woman is her confidence and when you're dressing in something classy and modest--you ooze confidence. That's beautiful. And hot. And that's good.
Some women are saying you don't need to dress modestly to benefit the boys--boys should be taught to respect women all the time. They should. Boys should be raised to view women as women and not as their bodies alone. They should be raised to control themselves at all times. That should be expected. But still--boys and wired to be attracted to girls. That's how it is. Girls in skimpy clothes are distracting and not in a good way. When you dress modestly you make it easier for boys to be around you and focus on you as a person.
I don't know how we'll teach you girls about modesty. I guess by example is the best way. It's difficult when even family members buy you sleeveless outfits (you're babies so it's ok, right?). Some day we'll have to crack down. We'll have to talk with you seriously about where the line is when it comes to clothes. I know your dad will be more strict than me. That's his job. But I hope he doesn't have to be. I hope you feel confident enough that you just gravitate to the clothes that speak to your inner beauty. I hope you find joy in long skirts that swish like a bell and tops that you can move around in easily without worrying about a slip up. I hope you find what's comfortable--versus what's popular. I hope you're active and adventurous enough that a bikini just won't work for you anyways.
You are beautiful girls. I know I'm biased when I say that but you are. So I'm pretty sure you'll be attractive to guys no matter what you wear. It's ok to dress up and wear clothes that fit and to feel sexy but just remember it's your smile guys will be attracted to first!
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